Walking by faith

I’ve been unemployed since June 23. It’s starting to wear on me.

The interview with Reed Medical Group came and went, and I haven’t heard from them since. They no doubt have found a candidate that better fit their needs than I, and I wish the new hire luck. To find a good job these days is a prize.

I’ve sent out several more resumes, by post and by e-mail, this week, and with each one my hope of finding a job grows a tiny bit dimmer. It’s discouraging to send out many resumes and letters, only to discover that many people don’t find you interesting enough to warrant even a phone call, let alone an interview.

Of all things, I’ve reapplied for my former job at the hospital. The worst that can happen is that they don’t rehire me; no harm, no foul. But (if any of my former coworkers/employers are reading this), I’m interested.

In the meantime, I’m applying to lots of others jobs, as many as I can find that seem like I could do. I’ve applied to all manner of administrative assistant jobs, clerk positions, paraprofessional jobs with the Lawrence school district, and to Wal-Mart and Dillon’s. Also, I’m learning to walk by faith, not by sight. That’s proving to be very difficult.

Walking by faith means that we trust God, whom we cannot see and cannot predict, to do what is right and just in His time, even when it seems that things are bad. We can see when things are bad — we’re unemployed, we’re ill, we’re broke — and it’s easy to become very anxious about these situations, especially when it seems that nothing we do is helping. Walking by faith is trusting Him.

I’m praying more these days. Azrael and I say prayers at bedtime every night, but I’m starting to pray more during the day, and before I go to sleep. I’ll never reach St. Patrick’s frequency (more than 100 times a day, according to one source I heard), but it’s more than before.

Walking by faith has enabled me to relax and better enjoy all the days I’m at home with Azrael and Jordan. Jordan is getting closer and closer to crawling, and just this week started eating rice cereal. To that end, either she’s picking up on it faster than Azrael did, or I’m more patient this time around. She seems to believe that rice cereal is good for the skin. Some always winds up coating her cheeks and chin. Azrael is getting better about coloring within the lines of pictures, and we’ve built several very strange block towers lately. Tomorrow is her first day back at preschool, and she’s very excited, for this year she’s going to Kennedy Elementary. She’s going to be a Courageous Condor!

I’m blessed. Very, very blessed. I thank God for all that He has given me.

I just wish He would give me a job. 🙂 All in His time, I know.

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