Writing

14,094!

That’s how far I’ve gotten in Exorcism so far!

I’m very pleased, especially since when I started Friday evening, I had a little over 7,600 words in. I have come close to doubling my total in only two days! And that’s only what I’ve got typed up . . . I’m writing this longhand, so that word count is only what’s on the computer. I still have 11 1/2 pages in my notebook yet to type. And I’m not nearly done writing!

The only, and albeit slight, problem is that my productivity is spread over four files — the primary file that goes from the beginning, and the others that are three separate scenes all involving Mischa. I’ve found that Mischa’s scenes are easier to write and come quicker than Sarah’s. I’m hoping this isn’t because I fixate on pain. I think part of this ease is that Mischa is by far the older character. He is the second RPG character I ever created, and that was sixteen years ago! Now he has made the jump from game to literature (though I do not claim that Exorcism is proper literature; that word sounds too proper for what I write), reversing the jump Adrian made. Mischa has hung around in my mind for many years, going through multiple incarnations, but at heart staying the same. Thus, I think (hope) this familiarity with him is why I can get his scenes easier than Sarah’s.

Plus, as Sarah shares a few qualities with me (severe depression, a fondness for the color black, and one of my old jobs), she’s a bit closer to home. While that should in some ways make her easier to write, at the same time it distances her from me, because I have self-esteem issues, and I have never truly been comfortable in the company of women. Nearly all of my friends I’ve made throughout my life to this point have been male, while just a handful are female. One of those latter, Rayna, pointed out back in college something I hadn’t realized before, but accepted as true (at least then): “Women assume all other women are bitches until proven otherwise.”

Furthermore, Sarah is Luci. This is not a secret in the novel; in fact, her question “Who am I?” is a central theme of the story, alongside forgiveness and laying the past to rest. I’ve “killed” Luci a few times already, because she is a troubled individual whose previous versions were so unpleasant, I didn’t want to deal with them anymore.  Writing her sections of the story is a bit like talking with someone you had serious problems with in the past, but you’re still trying to be social on occasion. I think that awkwardness is fading, thankfully.

More news as events warrant!

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